I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize