great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize
