both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize