Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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