im having a threesome with these popsicles
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
