Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
