it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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