Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
