sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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