i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
