That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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