i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize