: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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