He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Hippo gnu deer
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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