Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
