Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
