the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
