did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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