Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
