that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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