yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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