The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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