are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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