marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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