just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
