Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
the day after is always just damage control
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
