I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
