that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
