she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Randomize
