How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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