I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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