before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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