I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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