I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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