please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Randomize
