remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize