whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize