Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
4 words: hood of his car
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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