No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
