I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
