youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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