thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
