We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I need a beard to bite.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
