when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
