This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
