He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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