I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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