I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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