we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
