Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
either way he was missing a nipple.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
