I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
